Static Growth

Things change. People change. But some things always stay the same.

Ripe

I work hard, and when I get home, I don't always really feel like getting dressed up in a complex outfit. It's times like those that wonderfully simple frocks come to my rescue. This tie-dye dress has been in my wardrobe for several years now, and while it doesn't get tons of wear, I still love it. In a way, it symbolizes the beginning of my journey into who I am now.

 Dress - Purchased from After Shower Shop on Etsy

I actually wore this dress in one of my very first ever posts on this blog, back in September of 2010. It seems like a lifetime ago when I look back on it, even though it's been barely three years. I've changed a lot and come a long way.

My outward appearance is quite similar, but on the inside, I'm a whole new person. I was a little green sprout back then, and now I'm a thriving tree with leaves unfurled. Being in my mid-twenties, I'm still very young and have a lot of growing and changing to do yet. But being able to look back and see and feel my progress and growth is really nice.



The sun rises every morning, granting us a new day to do with as we please. It's up to us to use that time to our best advantage, to enjoy it, and this life we have under that sun. I used to struggle through my days, slogging through them like a chore, forever living for the horizon without any real goal or destination in mind. My days were slipping by unnoticed, wasted, when those days were exactly what living is all about. I'm doing my best not to waste any more sun rises, and to relish all the sunsets. I hope to enjoy so many more. Cheers!

Have Some Cuteness

Seeing as I am leaving to head off to the Electronic Brain festival today, I thought I would leave you all with some fuzzy baby-bird cuteness (after my outfit of course). These photos were taken a few weeks ago while out walking around Dow's Lake with a friend also kind enough to take my outfit photos. Said friend is very tall which explains why the view of me is from higher up than usual haha... Why it never occurred to me to take outfit photos by the lake is beyond me.

 

Dress - Purchased from Sally Jane Vintage on Etsy

Belt - Gift from Heather

Sandals - Spring

Is it weird that I actually feel more awkward having someone take my outfit photos than I do doing it by myself via timer? Even if I'm in public, somehow being by myself is easier. I guess because I don't care what strangers think but I for some reason still worry the person photographing me will think I'm a loon. 

That first photo with the seagull swooping down just cracks me up. The baby geese were already practically bigger than it was! We'd brought along old bread and so by the time we left there was quite a feathered frenzy going on. A couple with a young baby were there and I gave them some bread and it really made the kid's day to have those baby geese waddle up to him!

For being such cranky, cantankerous birds, geese are still very lovely to look at. It's just a shame they poop so much! I'm pretty sure these geese parents only tolerated our getting so near because we were handing out bread. Anyway, off I go adventuring! Expect a post with tales of my weekend sometime upon my return. Have a great weekend everybody! Cheers!

Inside Outward

If you could take a peek inside my mind and see my thoughts, things would probably look a lot like the print on this dress. Bright. Cheerful. Bold. Lively. Dynamic. To name a few. There are so many joyous thoughts and plans rushing around in there. It's like a crazy game of bumper cars, with flashing lights and ringing sounds as riders get jostled roughly about. All in good fun though!

Dress - Purchased from Ninth Avenue Vintage on Etsy 

Earrings - Gift from grandmother 

Sandals - Sears

Of course, not everybody enjoys a good bumper car battle, and so not everyone is comfortable with me and my various forms of self expression. Like my clothes. Or my taste in music. Or my past-times. Which is really just a loss for them! I tend to think, about 98% of the time, that I am super-awesome-fantastic and anybody would be crazy not to like me. And while that's extremely egotistical, I'd rather be a happy egotist than an unhappy person overly concerned about others' opinions.

Of course that doesn't mean I don't care about others' feelings. I think this mindset kind of helps me. Being friendly and open and caring is a lot easier if you already think you're the bees' knees. At least it seems so to me. I don't need outside validation to be a happy person. I'm not seeking approval or support. Whether or not someone thinks my dress is obnoxious, or that my life views are naive really doesn't concern me. I don't worry about those things and I try my best to be nonjudgmental about those things towards others. It's harder for me to deal with the rejection of my friendship and love than it is to deal with someone thinking I have bad taste in shoes or need a hair cut. I'm a selfless egotist, perhaps? Or maybe self-confidence is too often called egoism and I'm getting them all mixed up. (Bumper car crash!)

Let's just say that sometimes I do come off as harsh. Beating around the bush is not my style and in some instances my blunt honesty can be a little more than people can handle. I don't intentionally try to be hurtful or unfeeling or self-centered, but in the end my priorities do revolve around myself. It takes a lot of effort and presence of mind for me to take other people's feelings and viewpoints into account when I interact with others. I'm not fond of people or situations that upset me or make me uncomfortable and sometimes I can lash out more quickly than I should. I'm still learning.

Oftentimes it feels like I'm at an emotional learning stage that I'm too old to really be in. I swear everybody else went through this awkward crap in their teens? I'm all thumbs. I blunder through sensitive emotional interactions. I have the hardest time reading the level of someone's emotions. Are they only kind of grumpy or are they enraged? Is she just a little sad or is she about to burst into nonexhaustible tears? And I always feel so clumsy trying to console or cheer someone up. It's frustrating because I would love to be that person, but I'm still busily gluing my own parts back together. Trying to help someone else do that seems beyond my abilities right now. I mean well, but I'm not willing to put myself in a position I know isn't healthy for me.

Anyway, all that nonsense aside, things are good. I've booked a bunch of days off this month for various activities. Tomorrow is booked for a major apartment cleaning, which isn't very exciting, but things spice up after that. Tonight is my weekly belly dance class and beers with my friend Laura. Saturday is my friend Helen's baby shower, and then a night out at the bar with a fun group. Next weekend I'm heading out into Québec to attend the Electronic Brain music festival. I am SO excited for this! So excited!! It's going to be a blast. And then the weekend after that one, I'm going up to Montreal to visit my super-awesome friend Nicole. Plus a bunch of other amazing things because my life is just amazing right now. Emotional awkwardness and all! I hope you are all having a groovy week. Cheers!

It's a Parrot Party

It felt wonderful to wear this romper out in the warm weather. For some reason I didn't get around to wearing it much last year, hopefully I do so more this time around. My weekend was crazy busy. I think I got about five hours of sleep in a span of 48 hours at one point. I headed out dancing on Friday night and things just rolled along and the next thing I knew the sun was rising and the sky had the soft fuzzy cotton look that comes with dawn.

Romper - Purchased from Reluctant Damsel on Etsy

Sandals - Sears

The ironic part is that I kept saying I had to take it easy and have an earlier night because I was going to an open house at Ottawa's Cordon Bleu at ten the next morning. I still attended the info session, but I was running on a two and a half hour nap haha... I felt better whenever I was moving, so the forty five minute walks there and back were really quite enjoyable. The sun was out, the birds were chirping and there was a lovely breeze. It was still early enough for the earth to have that cool morning feeling to it. I was pretty miserable sitting inside but I'm glad I attended the session. I'm still see-sawing between Pastry and Cuisine, now more towards the first than the later. It's so hard choosing.

I had the opportunity to see the kitchens and talk to some of the Chefs, as well as see one of them make chocolate boxes right in front of us. All of the teachers are French Chefs from France and they all have that typical French accent, which amuses me to no end. They seem like a bunch of great characters and teachers. I really want to attend. I'm also waffling between taking just the beginner level and seeing about doing the rest later, or doing the whole Pastry diplôme in one chunk. The problem with doing it all at once is I'd run out of money to live on midway and I don't think I could work and learn at the same time. Not to mention having to take out another ten grands worth of student loans. Me no likey debt.

I'm hoping that having the beginner certificate will be enough to help me along for a while. And as much as I love both baking and cooking, I don't want to be a world renowned chef. I have no interest in touring the world or working in a fancy five star restaurant. I just like making tasty things and feeding people. Not to mention I am totally okay with washing dishes or sweeping floors in a bakery if that gets me in and lets me watch experienced bakers. I am not willing to be someone's office bitch admin assistant though, because I have no interest in moving up in that kind of environment and see no worth in the work.

It reads: A Bad Day on Vacation Always Beats A Good Day At Work!

Now finally I can explain the post's title. A few weeks back I walked by a shop called Fab Gear 64 on Wellington and saw this purse in the window. The shop was closed at the time but it had gotten my attention and the purse (okay, more like giant tote, but I say purse) was calling me. A few days later I walked by again while the shop was open, went in, fell in love and brought it home. Yes. It is covered in crazy partying parrots. My friend said they remind her of elderly people in Miami. They're having a good time though, and I dig it!

This thing is huge and glaring and sticks out. But I love it ever so much. It helps that it is both machine washable and has a wipe-down canvas interior while still being lightweight, perfect for my summer adventuring. Plus it has frigging partying parrots on it, how can it get any better?! I'm now living by their example and just having a good time as much as possible! I think they would approve of my past weekend.

In less than two weeks, my friend Laura and I will be selling crafty things at the Ravenswing Craft and Zine Fair here in Ottawa. Of course I've been procrastinating and am probably more behind in a few projects than I should be, but it's not the end of the world, I always manage to work things out in the end. It should be a great time. I hope you are all having a good Monday. Cheers!

Zounds!

This outfit surprised even me. I wore it to go to the Orchid show with my friends and it took about two minutes before one of them exclaimed... "Hey, Célynne's wearing pants!" The only reason I was comfortable like this (and I still felt rather naked) was because my blouse covered most of what bothers me being seen. Also is it just me or do the people who make jeggings assume we are all 6 feet tall? Because these are a size Small and I've still got oodles of material pooling around my ankles and knees.

 

Blouse - Purchased from Cookies and Crème Vintage on Etsy

Belt - Déjà New consignment shop in Ottawa

Jeggings - Hue

Shoes - Hush Puppies from Sears

My weekend was a whirlwind. I attended a friend's baby shower on Saturday. It was the first time our girl group had been together in its entirety in years (well, our 6th musketeer is out in Alberta!) and it amazed me how much we had changed and yet stayed the same. One friend brought along her seven (!) year old daughter and it blew my mind once again that my friends are parents and wives and husbands. I keep forgetting we're adults.

 
I'd be lying if I said seeing these things - marriages and babies - happening in the lives of my friends didn't make me sad. While I am overjoyed that these wonderful people are achieving these happy points in their lives, I'm also mourning them a little. Anybody who's had friends have kids knows what I'm talking about. No matter how hard you and they try, it's always going to be different, and very much so.

 

It's everything from having less time and less money, to new priorities and new people. Parents spend a lot of time with other parents. Because us single folks can only take so much diaper-talk and I gather parents can only take so much of hearing about the life they can't live anymore. I'm okay with their choices and where their lives take them - their life is theirs to live after all - but I'll miss the way things used to be nonetheless.

I knew 2012 was going to hold a lot of changes for me - felt it true in my bones - but I never thought I would be going through such an intense personal transformation again. Imagine sitting in front of a huge pile of building blocks, with the task of building who you want to be, but without clear plans on how to do it. (Maybe your snot-nosed cousin tore up the instructions?) You work your way up, only to realize you made a mistake, or you don't like something, or you get a better idea. It's a fluid work in progress with more than one outcome and none of them need to be final. Right now, I'm taking blocks down, turning them around in my hands, and trying to imagine the next thing I want to build with them.

 

There have been a few false starts and I haven't built up much further than my personal foundations, but at least those are solid and dependable now. My structure will have a dependable base upon which to be built, and that gives everything I put into this a better chance of success. I'm also learning to trade building blocks with others, for parts we each might need. Yeah, I'm really digging this metaphor! I hope it makes some sort of sense haha... Anyway, I hope you all had a great weekend and that your Monday is going well. Cheers! 

Another Week Done

This was the dress that started it all for me, the very first vintage dress I ever bought. The old elastic at the waist doesn't help to keep the waist nipped in anymore, so I use a broach to pin it to fit. I'm going to wear this baby until it falls apart! It just feels so wonderful and has such great movement. The colours aren't exactly springy but that makes no difference to me. I've never dressed according to seasonal colour pallets anyway!

 

Dress - Purchased from Moonshine Junkyard on Etsy

Lynx Fang Earrings - Purchased from Aranea Designs on Etsy

Shoes - Lulu's

I've been so busy lately, with both work and my social activities in the evenings and on weekends. Tonight will be the first evening this week that I have to stay home and just be with myself. I am very much looking forward to the me-time this evening... even if part of it will involve doing laundry. I can't avoid housekeeping forever, and I really hate being in a messy, untidy, borderline-filthy environment.

 

I can't wait to just get home! My brain is practically melting out my ears from boredom here at 'work', the place where not much work actually happens. (And people wonder how I wasn't surprised my position was cut.) I have someone coming over tomorrow and I want my apartment to be spick and span and I won't be able to stop thinking about it until I've gotten all that cleaning done. I'm also going to an Orchid Show on Sunday which promises to be interesting. Plenty of photos will be taken. I hope you all have a great weekend. Cheers!

Call Me Heidi

For some reason, now that I look at these photos, I feel like I should have pigtail braids and be traipsing across rolling Swedish hills to go milk a cow or something. I don't know. I'm quite mad! Mad enough to pair a neon green skirt with this tunic. I don't particularly like how my winter boots (emergency ones bought on clearance when I literally walked through my other pair) look with everything but I dislike being in my sock feet in photos anymore.

Tunic - Purchased from Mr. Idaho's Vintage on Etsy

Skirt - Thrifted from Value Village

Belt - Gift from Heather

Boots - Some sports store

Is this outfit flattering? No. Is it pleasing to the eye? Most people would disagree. Is it classy, clean or crisp? Nope. And I like it that way. My workday outfits have to confirm to some slightly more polished dressing rules, so I tend to get sloppy and free on weekends and weeknights. Screw figure-flattery or looking sexy, I just want to wear something fun and something me. So I do.

I can't get over how much embroidery is on this tunic. So many itty bitty little details! The green in the embroidery was nearly identical to the skirt too, so it was practically a must to put them together. I can't wait to wear this again once it's not freezing outside and I can be bare legged! The skirt has such wonderful flounce and swing, with so much fabric to twirl about.

I hope you all had a good weekend. Mine was alright for the most part, but not as good as I had hoped. I'm a bit miffed with some friends who had promised me something, then not only promptly reneged that promise, but then offered two other people that which they had promised me. Right in front of me. It'd be like promising a thirsty person a glass of water, pulling it away at the last moment and saying there isn't enough, only to then give it to two other people who don't need it, in front of that thirsty person's face. And then acting like they'd never offered in the first place.

I am so over winter. So done. It's still frigidly cold outside though, of course. I just want bare legs and toes in the grass again. To be able to go outside without having to pile on 4 layers. For a time when walking to the grocery store doesn't depend on which direction the wind is blowing ice pellets (into or away from your eyes). I want to go camping, a lot. Come on warm weather, get here! Cheers!

Don't worry, be happy!

Happy Friday everybody! I'm so excited for this weekend. I'm going to a Christmas tree decorating party at a good friend's this evening, then I'm meeting up with my women's social group for tea, cakes and talk tomorrow, and finally Sunday I'm going out for breakfast and doing some shopping with other friends. I'm just in such a good mood lately, I don't know what it is, but I'm not complaining. I've decided I want to be a happy person, all the time (or as much as possible).

Dress as blouse - Purchased from Sally Jane Vintage on Etsy

Skirt - Thrifted from Value Village

Necklace - Made for outfit

Flats - Ardene's

I want to be that person that makes you feel better just by being around them, and that leaves you with a little extra warmth in your heart. Maybe it's naive. Maybe it's silly. But I always want to be able to give someone a smile and brighten someone's day and help people let go and be happy.

I'm just filled with this overwhelming amount of joy and love and it needs to be shared. It comes out in warm hugs and home-made cookies and heartfelt notes to friends... I don't know, it's hard to explain. I've just been feeling so many strong, wonderful emotions lately. A friend of mine said its a sign of my growing maturity, and being able to understand things in more depth.

This month is going to be jam packed with activity for me. The thing I'm looking forward to most at the moment is this coming Monday however. I won't explain the story behind it, but I've just re-discovered a long-lost grandfather and more welcoming family than I know what to do with. It's all rather overwhelming and I keep wanting to cry from just how happy and thankful I am to have all these people in my life all of a sudden. And that they genuinely want me!

I want to be a bright sunny light, a gift to them, and everyone in my life. Maybe I'm just doing more growing up or having an epiphany over something obvious. But I intend to love all my friends and family fervently and fully, and to find joy in every moment I can. I hope you all have a really fantastic, joy-filled weekend! Cheers!

Leather Layers

Happy Monday everybody, I hope you're having a good one! How were your weekends? Mine was really nice. I cooked up a big batch of corn chowder, and then made way too many citrus butter cookies. And I worked on my zombie novel and made myself a necklace to match today's (that I am currently wearing, not posting) outfit.

Jacket - Danier Leather

Dress - Purchased from Reluctant Damsel on Etsy

Boots - Some shop on Sparks Street

Cardigan - Thrifted from Value Village

Shoes - From my grandmother

The first photo is walking-to-work-Cel, and the second is at-work-Cel. Work-Cel involves much less leather haha... I can't help it though, I love leather and most things made out of it. Speaking of which, these are my new (although now a few weeks old) leather boots! They rubbed the back of my right ankle raw the first few days but that seems to be all sorted out, and they are some good walking boots for me.

I've been falling behind with my blog reading and blog commenting, which I mostly blame on NaNoWriMo. Must. Achieve. Daily word limit. Must not give up. My zombie novel seems to be going good so far though, and I got through the weekend while keeping my word count where it needed to be. I'd been worried the weekend would put a kink in things. But I had a really good writing session Sunday morning that saved my skin.

I used to write stories and tales all the time in my teens. I'm not really sure why I stopped, considering how much I enjoy doing this. I guess that's what NaNoWriMo is all about... getting people to start writing!

This isn't the greatest outfit. The dress has been posted about oodles of times before, my hair looks like crap and my face is all weird and I look horribly tired. But eh, sometimes, I just look like a tired, frazzled, frumpy person and that's all there is to it. At least I'm not wearing sweat pants!

I hope you all have a groovy week. Cheers!

Anticipation

My buying habits lately seem to have been this: buy nothing for weeks, then spend a bunch of money all at once. To my credit, this time at least these are things I need. Mostly. Kinda. Okay so maybe only one of my purchases was actually needed but... Well, have a gander at the lovely things whisking their way towards me in parcels and packages. You'll understand.

This dress has been in my Etsy Favourites for ages, and when I read that Sally Jane Vintage was having an epic summer-items sale well... I wound up buying three lovely dresses, and with shipping, it still barely cost me over $50. Happy? Oh goodness yes.

This pink beauty is an unexpected purchase for me. Just a few years ago, I was adamantly against any and all things pink. You wouldn't catch me dead wearing pink. And here I am, buying a solid pink girly dress. Oh how the times they are a' changing. I look forward to having fun layering this one in the winter months. Who says summer dresses are only for summer, eh? Psh...

Amazing, right? Right. Bright bold colours, giant happy flowers, crazy patterns around the hem... I can't wait to have this baby in my hands. To wear it everywhere and anywhere. Oh the love affair this dress and I will have.... Ahem. As you can tell, I really dig this dress. I'm a sucker for the 60's, ahh...

Here's where things get a bit boring (for you) but I really am excited to get these wedge sandals. The incline isn't too steep and they look uber padded and... I spent 2 weeks debating on whether or not to buy these and I finally caved. They were on sale anyway, so it was meant to be right? I'm hoping these are as comfortable as they look.

These lovely platform pumps were my "needed" purchase. I've got a pair of similarly coloured heels but they were thrifted and are long past when they really should have been tossed. So this is me investing in their replacement. Besides, how could I resist? I have a feeling these will make me feel like Joan Holloway when I wear 'em.

Have your purchased anything spiffy you're excited about? Shoes? A dress? These are probably going to be the last of my purchases for a while, since I'm heading to a Reptile Expo and the Zoo in Toronto next month, which will make a pretty big monetary dent in things. Considering 4 out of 5 of these items was bought on sale, I feel pretty good about this. All the money I've been spending on other things though... not so much. Oh money, you're so stressful.

I hope you're all having a groovy Wednesday. There were no ants in my sink this morning so I am a happy camper. Cheers!

She's at it again

I am on a roll. After wearing one dress as a top last week, I did it again last Friday. And this time I got my butt out to Dow's Lake Park and took some photos. It's a beautiful park and, thankfully, a mostly empty one. I still got some funny stares though. Now I know how Liz feels.

Dress (as top) - Purchased from Heather's Etsy shop Moonshine Junkyard

Skirt - Thrifted from Value Village

Shoes & Belt - Fairweather

I could probably have done with a better belt for this, since this one is rather loose (I'm actually holding it tighter in the photos, shh) but I'm pretty happy with this outfit. The dress is too short for work, but its light fabric and sleevelessness were offering me what I needed on a hot day.

Covering the bottom half with this long skirt worked perfectly. It compliments the green from the floral pattern, and it just happens to be my favourite colour. I felt very much like a lady wearing this, and it was great being able to just slip the skirt and belt off at the end of the day, stuff them in my backpack, and walk home in just the one dress.

Speaking of which, I'm going back through my posts trying to find the last time I wore this dress and... apparently I wear it a lot but haven't actually photographed any of the outfits in half of forever. A shame, I love the dress! I'll have to try and get some outfit photos with it more often before summer is over.

I really outdid myself with this next photo (in my opinion) and I'm very happy with it. Why am I so happy? Keep in mind, I use my camera's timer, which gives me a total of 10 seconds to go from pressing the button, to running to the rock, posing, rearranging my ample skirt, smiling, and hoping I don't look like a dork.

I did quite well indeed, if I do say so myself. I'm kinda thinking of having some of these more posed outfit photos printed and framed and giving a few to my grandmother. Is that weird? She just doesn't have any photos of me that aren't blurry crappy ones, or the ooold ones from when I was pudgy and graduating college. I just think she might enjoy some pretty portraits of her granddaughter... am I crazy? Warn me if so, so I don't embarrass myself doing that hah.

A friend and I are going horseback riding tomorrow, and I am so excited. I've only ridden a horse once, back when I was a little girl, but I've always loved horses (what girl doesn't?) so of course... Excited! Then on Sunday we're going to go see the National Capital Tournament, a show jumping competition where the winner will earn points towards rankings that will decide whether or not they get into the Olympics! Pretty darn impressive. Expect photos of horses in the coming weeks!

I know this is the "last summer weekend" for some of you, so I hope you all have absolutely super awesome weekends. Cheers!